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Appearance Concerns
Appearance Concerns
Physical appearance can change a lot during puberty and adolescence, which can make young people feel self-conscious and insecure.
While it’s completely normal to worry about appearance from time to time, some young people become increasingly preoccupied with the way they look, which can have a big impact on mental health and everyday life. This article provides information on appearance preoccupation, highlighting some things to look out for and tips to care less about your looks.
Appearance concerns
It is normal for young people to feel dissatisfied with the way they look from time to time, perhaps thinking their skin is too blemished, their nose is too big, or that they are too short. In fact, research into body image highlights that it is normal for women, and increasingly men, to feel some negativity towards their appearance. Indeed, most people check how they look in the mirror, use make-up to enhance certain features, or change their hairstyle to feel more confident.
However, if feeling dissatisfied becomes more constant, it could be a sign of appearance preoccupation, which can have a big impact on mood, relationships, socialising, hobbies, and/or studying. It can also lead to mental health problems such as anxiety and depression.
Social media has been shown to increase appearance concerns (read more in our previous article). So, learning to become more accepting of the way we look is important now more than ever.
Do you have appearance preoccupation?
Many people struggle to talk about appearance concerns as they feel ashamed of their preoccupation and are worried people will think they are vain. If you are worried, or suspect a young person you know may be, consider how often (never, sometimes, often, very often) the following statements apply:
- I feel very dissatisfied with one or more aspects of my appearance.
- Thinking about my appearance upsets me greatly.
- I check my appearance in the mirror or other reflective surfaces.
- I diet or exercise to alter my body (e.g., to increase muscle mass, for weight loss).
- I hold my body in certain positions to hide aspects of my appearance.
- I compare my body with others (including on TV or social media).
- I spend time researching ways to change my appearance.
- I think about or have cosmetic surgery.
- I avoid socialising because I am uncomfortable with my appearance.
- I avoid physical contact from others because I worry what they will think of my body (e.g., hugs, touch, sex).
- I avoid certain activities where I think others might judge my body (e.g., going to gym, playing sport, dancing, meeting new people).
- When I socialise, I find it difficult to focus on the conversation because I am caught up in thoughts about my appearance.
- I spend a lot of time altering my appearance before leaving the house (e.g., make-up).
- I use dietary products (i.e., protein powders, cleanses, muscle building supplements) to alter my body.
- I scrutinise my appearance in photos, and/or edit the way I look before sharing photos with others.
Answering “often” or “very often” to multiple statements may suggest you are overconcerned with your appearance. The next step is to consider the impact this preoccupation is having on everyday life.
What keeps appearance concerns going?
Behaviours have a big influence on the way we think and the way we feel, and although a young person thinks wearing lots of make-up, avoiding bright lighting, and covering their face help their appearance concerns, they actually keep them going.
- Appearance focussed attention. When we are worried about something, it is natural for us to focus on it more and more. In fact, it can be incredibly hard not to think about it. With attention caught up in worrisome thoughts about appearance, it is impossible to concentrate on anything else and a young person will feel more and more depressed, anxious, and even disgusted by their appearance. How often do you think about your appearance? What triggers those thoughts?
- Body checking and reassurance seeking. Some examples of these behaviours are mirror gazing, checking appearance in reflective surfaces, measuring body parts, and asking family and/or friends for reassurance. Young people who are overconcerned with their appearance will constantly seek feedback on whether there is something ‘wrong’ with the way they look. Unfortunately, the more they check and ask for reassurance, the more ‘tuned in’ they are to noticing things they don’t like.
- Appearance altering behaviours. Young people with appearance preoccupation may engage in behaviours that change their appearance significantly. For example: wearing lots of make-up, following strict facial or haircare routines, extreme dieting, overexercising, or overusing cosmetic procedures.
- Avoidance behaviours. If a young person is worried about people judging the way they look, they may start to avoid certain places, social situations, or activities. While avoidance may relieve anxiety in the short-term, over time, avoidance maintains fears and perpetuates appearance concerns, adding further fuel to the vicious cycle.
Tips for reducing appearance concern
It would be unrealistic to expect a young person to never worry about the way they look. Instead, learning to accept appearance is key.
- Identify your triggers. Young people with appearance preoccupation may engage in behaviours that change their appearance significantly. For example: wearing lots of make-up, following strict facial or haircare routines, extreme dieting, overexercising, or overusing cosmetic procedures.
- Understand what keeps it going. What behaviours do you use to try and relieve your appearance concern? How often are you checking your appearance in mirrors or reflective surfaces? Are you avoiding certain lighting or situations?
Note down answers to these questions and catch any worrisome thoughts that may be fuelling your appearance concerns. Once you have a better understanding of your triggers, you can move onto challenging the behaviours that keep it going.
For more information and support visit the following links:
Reading and resources:
Self-help workbook:
Article date 12th July 2022
Article written by Imogen Clifford, Assistant Psychologist, Bristol CBT Clinic